The Stench of Honolulu by Jack Handey:
I wandered down a crooked back alley and came to a souvenir shop. I don’t think I would have even noticed it except for a big neon sign that said, Souvenirs! Curios!
The shop had the usual tourist junk. But something caught my eye. I had never seen anything so exquisite. It was a little statue of a native girl with her arms held out. It was locked in a display case. I jimmied the lock with a paper clip and took it out.